Do you find yourself canceling a night out to finish up last minute work at the office? Do your friends call you to tell you their latest troubles yet never seem to have time to hear about yours? Do you feel as though people can manipulate you with lies or “half-truths?” Do you own a t-shirt that says, “Stop me before I volunteer again”? If any of these sounds like you, it may be time to work on setting some boundaries.
According to the book, Boundaries – When to Say YES – When to Say NO – To Take Control of Your Life by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, “Setting boundaries inevitably involves taking responsibility for your choices.” This may seem like a contrary statement and you may be saying to yourself, “I do take responsibility for my choices, it’s everyone else that’s driving me crazy! That is a sure sign to take a look at exactly what choices you are making! The key is to make the RIGHT choices.
Everyone wants to be responsible and everyone loves to be needed. The balance come in knowing when to say yes – without overtaxing our already busy lives, and when to say no – without guilt or regret. It is interesting to note that there is a simple summary of boundary problems that people have:
• Those who can’t say NO
• Those who can’t say YES
• Those who can’t hear NO
• Those who can’t hear YES
These four little “issues” can create BIG, BIG problems in our life. The good news is there is a solution. We can learn to identify the boundary problems in our life, locate their source of origination, and work toward setting boundaries of our own to ultimately, “take control of our life.”
Be sure and watch for my next blog as I explore the subject of boundaries further. As a life and business coach, and master Neuro-Linguistic (NLP) practitioner, I can show you how to recognize boundary problems in your life and start setting boundaries of your own. If you are ready to take back control of your life call me at 972-578-4745 or, click here for a complementary coaching session. All you have to do is say yes!